Tag Archives: SOC

Phone It In Phriday

30 May

See what I did there?

I am buried in Climb Out of the Darkness (HAVE YOU DONATED YET?), Warrior Mom Conference, and preparing all the new hat designs for their July debut.  My music studio’s recital is this weekend, I’m exercising 6 days a week, and with the added responsibilities of household chores, I’m barely keeping up.

But as I lifted my bicycle onto the car rack yesterday, I had a thought.

Six months ago, I would NEVER have been able to do this.

Lift the bike.

Take both kids out for a ride on my own.

Juggle motherhood, two home businesses, non-profit work, and preparing a child for kindergarten.

Make phone calls to hospital executives and sound official.

Write sponsorship emails to major companies.

I may be phoning it in here, but I’m definitely in the arena in all the other areas of my life.  It’s a good kind of busy.  Amiyrah would call it “full.”  I like that.  Full.

My blog may be neglected.  My toilets may be dirty.  But my life is full.

gratuitous adorable toddler photo

gratuitous adorable toddler photo

 

How Is It May?

18 May

I’m sorry. How is it May already?  It’s like one day my yard was barren and grey, and the next day the whole thing had been colorized a la Wizard of Oz.  I keep finding myself surprised when my windows are full of green.

I’ve been neglecting the blog as of late.  And blogging in general.  I keep wondering who is reading all these blog posts that people write.  I barely have time to brush my teeth, and yet somebody is, because we all keep writing them.  I’d like to set aside an hour a week to just read and comment.  But which hour?

Elephant HatWhat have I been up to? Crocheting.  I want to have a new line of hats for babies and toddlers for the fall, and that means prototyping.  Nothing’s quite as horrible as spending four hours on a project only to finish it and decide you don’t quite like the look of it.  But I’m excited about the successes that have come out of all that failure and can’t wait to debut them in the shop.

Now that it’s nice out, I’ve been hiking, biking, walking, and jogging.  I’m supposed to climb a mountain in 34 days, so I’ve been working out in hopes that I won’t return from Mt. Washington in pieces.  I’ve actually GAINED weight (UGH) but I feel stronger and I have noticed my endurance improving.  It’s a good feeling, knowing that I’m taking care of my body and teaching my kids to be active and healthy.

And if I happen to pick up my computer?  I am writing, but it’s been sponsorship emails to hospitals and pieces for local media.  Between the Climb Out of the Darkness and the Warrior Mom Conference, I’m getting a crash course in marketing and PR – and thank goodness I’m a quick study.  Oh, did I not mention that I’m co-chairing the first ever Postpartum Progress Warrior Mom Conference?  Honored.  Overwhelmed.  Determined.

There really do need to be more hours in the day, because I just can’t find enough for all the things I want to do AND to watch Grey’s Anatomy while eating a sleeve of Oreos.  But I am still here.  And I’ll be back blogging before you know it.

Thought Vomit Thursday

13 Mar

I get in these ruts where I read everyone’s amazing words and see everyone’s amazing art and feel like a fraud.  As I type this, my husband sits next to me, his fingers clicking out a more sophisticated rhythm than mine.  Clickity-clack go our dueling keyboards, as he writes a doctoral academic paper and I?  I navel-gaze.

I should probably go wake the toddler.  This late nap will cost me dearly come dark.  Sometimes I’m a real asshole to future me.

Today was my daughter’s second visit to therapy.  She likes it.  I don’t think it’s enough to undo the years of damage I’ve done (I’m kidding, folks…kind of), but I do get the sense that she’s comfortable there and is trusting the therapy process.  I keep telling myself that at the very least, she’s learning at a young age that there are places to turn when you need help with your emotional life.

We’ve done two things in the last week that have really helped and make me feel like some kind of parenting expert.  But the truth is, that I muddled and then failed first.  In fact, I crashed face first at times, right into a wall of fear and shame and anxiety.  I guess that’s what parenting is, right? Huh.  The things they don’t tell you in birthing class.

Anyway.  Doodlebug has a marble jar and has for a while.  We first tried a jar of popsicle sticks – one stick for each good choice and negative one stick for poor choices.  When, after a week, she was indebted to the jar by -37 popsicles sticks, I started to wonder whether it was my child or the system that was really failing.  Now, we do marbles, and she earns them for kindness, for chores, for helping, and doesn’t lose them for her poor choices – consequences doled out (or earned, really) for poor choices are hopefully more logical.  And as a result, the jar really is a way to celebrate her growth.  I have been hesitant to offer marbles for ordinary expectations.  Do I really have to celebrate the grand achievement of wearing pants? Nobody throws me a confetti-powered parade when I don clothing below the waist, and believe me, some days it’s quite the accomplishment.

Turns, out, I do.  Wearing pants is hard for her.  We’ve ruled out legitimate sensory issues, and I really think it’s an exercise in control for her, which makes it even more annoying (truth bomb, folks)… but for whatever reason, it IS hard for her, so celebrating her ability to work through the hard is more than just legitimate.  And it’s working.  5 marbles in the jar each morning that she puts on her outfit (chosen the night before), with no alterations and with no meltdowns.

Perhaps this new strategy will only last a few weeks (or days), but I’ll take it.  And in any case, since beginning weekly therapy sessions, the entirety of our house feels just a little less volatile.

I feel like I should write something about the toddler – about how she’s finally growing a smidge taller and how she’s cutting several molars.  About how each day, she bursts out a new word, almost as if it was hiding inside her all along, just waiting for the right moment to scream “two mommies!” or “elbow!”  But I look through my photos and see nothing but her.

She’s cuter than her older sister.  At least for now.  Her toes are still kissable.  At what age do the toes become unkissable, or is that just me?  She stays still for photos, too, which I’m sure will pass in its own time.

I keep scrolling back up to see if this is publishable.  If it’s cohesive.  If it has worth.

I’m going to post it anyway.  Just to get it out of my head.

Breathe.

Click.

 

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